


As Long as I Have You, I'm Satisfied

by Ilyria



Category: Chinese Actor RPF, 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Famous Wang Yi Bo, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Insecurity, Jealousy, M/M, Manager Xiao Zhan, Perfect Boyfriend Xiao Zhan, Press and Tabloids, Secret Relationship, Sexual Frustration, Virgin Wang Yi Bo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:20:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24086515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ilyria/pseuds/Ilyria
Summary: After the photo of their kiss goes viral, Xiao Zhan deals with the media fallout while struggling to keep their relationship a secret.Yibo deals with jealousy, sexual frustration, and trunkloads of insecurity.Sequel toI’m Not as Good as You Think (Or as Bad as They Say)
Relationships: Wang Yi Bo/Xiao Zhan
Comments: 74
Kudos: 945





	As Long as I Have You, I'm Satisfied

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place right after the end of [I’m Not as Good as You Think (Or as Bad as They Say)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23349880). That should be read first or some parts may be confusing.
> 
> Told from Yibo's POV and title is from Xiao Zhan's song this time. Enjoy more PR Manager!Xiao Zhan x Celebrity Baby!Wang Yibo!
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/redsilklady)

Yibo wakes languidly to the scent of Xiao Zhan on the pillow and enough sunlight to tell him it’s midmorning. The other side of the bed is empty, and it takes him a moment to remember Xiao Zhan getting up in the middle of the night and giving him a kiss, telling him to go back to sleep before leaving.

Too bad, Yibo would’ve liked to spend the morning with Xiao Zhan in bed. Making out with Xiao Zhan the night before had been so good, so much better than Yibo imagined, that he didn’t even mind that that was all they did last night.

Yibo still can’t believe how things turned out. He’d expected the worst, which was for Xiao Zhan to reject him in the nicest, most unbearable way and then hand in his resignation effective immediately. In the best case scenario, Xiao Zhan would still reject him, maybe explain why they can’t ever be together, but then offer to pretend this never happened so they can continue being friends and colleagues. Yibo’s pining would be damned, but at least this way lets Yibo keep Xiao Zhan in his life.

He never would have imagined that Xiao Zhan would like him back. It’s just as astonishing to think about this morning as it had been twelve hours ago when Xiao Zhan gave him that kind, breathtaking smile and said he’s lucky to have him. Is _honoured_ to have him, like Yibo is something awesome and special, beyond what the average person deserves. If Xiao Zhan is misguided, Yibo isn’t going to correct him.

He has his clothes from yesterday, but he still goes through Xiao Zhan’s dresser. He loves that while Xiao Zhan is always impeccably dressed in a suit and tie at work, in his downtime he just wears whatever is comfortable. Xiao Zhan is real like that, perfectly at ease in hoodies, old T-shirts, and ripped jeans— _real_ ripped jeans that he wore out himself instead of the artificial, pretentious kind. (He’d explained this to Sungjoo once, to which Sungjoo texted back, _WOW. You have got it bad._ )

Pulling on an oversized sweater, he basks in the comforting scent of Xiao Zhan’s clothes. He’s aware that it’s kind of creepy, but he sort of feels he has a license to Xiao Zhan’s clothes now that they… Can he say dating? Or just mutually like each other? Besides if Xiao Zhan really minded it, he would’ve said something by the fifth time Yibo wore his clothes.

When he checks his phone, he has sixteen worried messages from family and friends but none from Xiao Zhan, who’s probably still tied up with that emergency. Yibo ignores the concerned messages for now—whatever is being said about him this morning is going to be flat out untrue or exaggerated. Come tomorrow, it will be some wild, new claim circulating.

There is a layer of unease in the atmosphere when he steps into the office. He doesn’t miss the wide-eyed looks staff give him, and it’s not long before an assistant informs him his presence is requested in Meeting Room 5.

In the meeting room waiting for him are Xiao Zhan, Yu-jie, and two members of management, one who he recognizes as Xiao Zhan’s boss. They’re all wearing tight expressions and there’s tension lining their jaws and shoulders.

When he sees the source of their anguish on the huge center screen, his jaw drops as horror consumes him.

It’s a paparazzi snap taken from far away of himself and Xiao Zhan last night. Kissing. His face is captured explicitly, though only the back of Xiao Zhan’s head is caught. With his back turned to the camera, he’s virtually anonymous.

Obviously, the photo has gone viral by now. He can’t move, can’t speak, can’t think.

“What is the meaning of this?” asks Manager Wu, the head of PR.

“It’s not his fault,” Xiao Zhan speaks up, voice strained. “It’s obvious from the photo that the other man kissed him.”

“Of course, it’s his fault. He should’ve known better than to let this happen. You’re too soft on him, Xiao Zhan. That’s why he gets into so much trouble,” his boss admonishes. He turns to Yibo, stern and angry. “What do you have to say for yourself?”

Astounded, Yibo struggles to move his mouth but doesn’t know what to say. He should apologize, but an apology won’t mean anything right now.

“Do you understand the mess you’ve made? The trouble you’ve caused from just one moment of indiscretion? What compelled you to do this public?” Manager Wu groans. “It’s bad enough that you went against our rules and began seeing someone, but must you do this _in public_?”

“He’s not to blame,” Xiao Zhan says again, “for being kissed and stalked by the paparazzi. Anyway, it’s done now. Let’s focus on what we can do to deal with this.”

“It doesn’t change the fact that he should know better,” the other senior executive says. “Well, young man, enlighten us. Who is this paramour of yours?”

Yibo cringes at the word and sees Xiao Zhan and Yu-jie doing so as well.

They don’t know it’s Zhan-ge in the photo, Yibo realizes. And if they don’t know by now, it means Xiao Zhan has deliberately not told them. What should he answer then without giving him away? Without thinking, he looks at Xiao Zhan helplessly.

Xiao Zhan opens his mouth, but his boss beats him to it, sighing. “Zhan-ge isn’t going to save you all the time, Wang Yibo. You’ve caused him enough trouble already. It’s about time you faced up to the consequences of your actions.”

“Yibo, what we want to know is are you going to see him again?” Yu-jie breaks in, getting straight to the point.

Yibo doesn’t know how to respond. Of course, he wants to, _intends_ to, but they’re not going to be happy with that answer.

But Xiao Zhan is worth more than their disappointment and he’s not going to let others’ disapproval stop him.

Straightening his spine and steeling himself, he announces with resolve, “Yes, I am. He’s my boyfriend.”

In his periphery, he sees Xiao Zhan drop his face into one hand and Yu-jie cover her mouth. As expected, the executives’ faces darken.

“Do you realize what you’re doing to your career?” Manager Wu says. “None of us want to dictate your personal life, especially when it comes to matters of the heart, but this is a very unwise decision. You will lose a lot of fans if this comes out.”

Yu-jie tries to reason with him. “Yibo, I think you understand that this isn’t a great move. You have no time for a boyfriend anyway. How will you balance the demands of your career with that of a relationship?”

“I can handle it. I’ll work it out,” Yibo stubbornly insists.

But it’s Xiao Zhan who crushes his very resolve. In the even, reasonable tone he uses to convince the most obstinate journalists, he says, “They’re right, Yibo. It’s not favourable for your career. You can’t have a boyfriend. We can’t go through with this.”

Yibo’s insides plummet.

But Xiao Zhan continues, and Yibo realizes he’s addressing the others in the room, not him. “We just put out an official statement that Yibo is single and not dating anyone weeks ago. We can’t deny this photo or contain it, but we can’t do a 180 and go public with this either.”

The executives agree. Clearly, they’ve been at this dilemma for hours now, and by their collective frustration, they’re no closer to agreeing on a damage control strategy.

They eventually dismiss him after he stands uselessly in the center too long, but not after instructing him to not have any contact with his boyfriend for now. He flees to a spare room in the office and after bracing himself for the public’s brutal reaction, dives into online headlines and articles about himself and his mystery lover.

It hasn’t even been sixteen hours since their encounter yesterday, but already there is a plethora of discussion and speculation on the tall, dark stranger’s identity. All the public really has to go on is the man’s height, which is just taller than Yibo’s own, and the suit that stretches across his shoulders, but just those details is enough to spring forth all sorts of wild theories.

Speculations range from another celebrity (replete with names of stars of the appropriate height), a director or producer in the industry, some successful professional like a banker or business executive, to an expensive, high-class escort or a wealthy sponsor looking for some celebrity sugar in exchange for agency investment. There is even—now this Yibo has to show Xiao Zhan—a conspiracy theory that suggests the stranger is a gangster and proves the agency owes its success to shady backing from the underworld.

Aside from guessing the mystery lover’s identity, social media is in an uproar over the breaking news. As anticipated, his fans are devastated at the visual proof of him romantically linked with someone. Some support him and are indignant on his behalf that his privacy was violated, that he just had his love life outed without consent. Yibo’s haters, on the other hand, claim that this photo is proof Yibo slept his way to the top, that he pimped himself out as a boytoy to influential men in entertainment for favours. It’s nasty, mean, and the furthest thing from the truth since Yibo has never gotten any.

He’s so engrossed in the internet’s reaction that it takes him by surprise when Xiao Zhan appears suddenly and grabs his arm. Before he knows it, Xiao Zhan has tugged him inside the nearest storage closet. Oh, why hadn’t Yibo thought of this fantasy before?

But Xiao Zhan is looking far too grave for a delectable, impromptu closet romp.

“What is it?” Yibo asks, filling with dread.

“I’m so sorry, Yibo,” Xiao Zhan begins. “None of this should’ve happened.”

A chill falls over Yibo. Is Zhan-ge regretting what happened yesterday? Is he having second thoughts after this morning, realizing just what he’s getting himself into?

But Xiao Zhan pulls him tight into his chest, presses a kiss on his temple. “This is all my fault. I can’t believe I let this happen when I’m supposed to think of you and your career. I should’ve known better than to kiss you in public. Now I’ve created this huge mess for both of us.”

“It’s okay, Zhan-ge,” Yibo says, relieved and enjoying being encircled in Xiao Zhan’s arms.

“But this means we can’t see each other for the next little while. We have to stay away from each other in case we are seen together and people put two and two together. Okay?”

Yibo nods into Xiao Zhan’s chest, knows it’s the logical thing to do though he loathes being apart from Xiao Zhan now that he has him again.

“We’re going to say the man in the photo—me—is a fan or admirer—maybe even a crazy stalker—and that you were politely rejecting me when this happened.”

Yibo knows nothing about spinning media stories but even he can tell this is too convenient. “But no one is going to buy that you’re just a fan or admirer. People are saying you’re a _gangster_! Or a sugar daddy. Even a high-class prostitute!”

Xiao Zhan rubs his temples. “How are those more believable? Anyway, even if they don’t believe us at first, if they don’t find anything contrary, they’ll have to accept what we say sooner or later. We’ll say this was a one-time thing that just happened unfortunately to fall so soon after your comments on Day Day Up but is completely unrelated. You are single, not seeing anyone, and _do not_ have a boyfriend,” Xiao Zhan emphasizes sternly.

Yibo’s stomach drops again. He knows it was a bit presumptuous because they haven’t gotten around to the b-word, but was Zhan-ge against Yibo calling him his boyfriend earlier? Tentative and afraid, he asks, “Then what are we?”

Xiao Zhan’s face immediately softens in a sudden about turn. “Oh darling, we can be whatever you want us to be,” he promises him, smiling that gentle, breathtaking smile of his.

Yibo needs the confirmation. “So we can be boyfriends?” he asks, holding his breath, desperate to know but also scared of the answer.

“Yes, sweetheart, if you’ll have me,” Xiao Zhan answers. Like Yibo wouldn’t want him.

As if there is a chance in hell of that happening. Joy swells every inch of Yibo.

“But in public, we’re just entertainer and manager, okay?” Xiao Zhan continues. “We have a professional relationship, nothing more. And you are not involved with anyone romantically—I assured them I’d talk you out of having a boyfriend. So don’t breathe a word about us to anyone.”

So joyous he’d promise Xiao Zhan anything at that moment, Yibo nods obediently. And then proceeds to make use of their privacy and make out with his new and first ever boyfriend.

\-----

Xiao Zhan releases an official press statement explaining what he’s already told him: that the “mystery lover” the press has dubbed is merely a determined admirer with no existing prior connection to Yibo. Yibo has firmly rejected his advances and won’t ever see him again, and this has nothing to do with the incident on Day Day Up weeks prior as that was a mere slip of the tongue. He affirms that Yibo is single and not romantically involved with anyone, that this is an individual occurrence and has been resolved.

Naturally, as Yibo predicted, the public doesn’t buy what PR team cooked up. It’s too coincidental that Wang Yibo would allude to a sweetheart’s existence on TV and then weeks later happen to be caught smooching someone he has nothing to do with. Instead, the official narrative spawns accusations that the agency is trying to hide something, inadvertently popularizing ideas that the mystery lover must be someone unsavoury like an escort or sugar daddy the agency wants covered up. On the other hand, it’s so coincidental that some claim this is must be a publicity stunt to drum up more spotlight on Wang Yibo with an upcoming drama on the way.

Media scrutiny on him intensifies threefold. Xiao Zhan has expressly forbidden him from saying anything more than “No comment,” so Yibo is happy to let him do all the talking. He trails behind Xiao Zhan like an obedient duckling as they wade through mobs outside the agency building. The reporters all know Xiao Zhan by now as Yibo’s publicist, so they shove microphones in his face and demand to know how aware he is of Yibo’s love life, if he knows who Yibo sees in his free time, etc. It’s impressive how Xiao Zhan withstands all the pressure with his voice calm and smile intact when Yibo would be an incoherent mess by now.

If his condo was watched before, it’s camped by now. Reporters are long past subtle, looming outside his building entrance ready to pounce. He obviously can’t stay home, but he can’t stay at Xiao Zhan’s either without leading stalkers to his apartment. Some friends kindly offer to host him for a while but it wouldn’t be fair to subject them to all the media focus, so in the end he books a hotel suite until the attention dies down. Xiao Zhan doesn’t trust hotel security and doesn’t like him staying there, but the press and his fans don’t know where he’s living and that’s all that matters.

Like Xiao Zhan ordered, they abstain from meeting outside of work in case people see them and start wondering about Wang Yibo’s tall companion. But staying away now that Zhan-ge is his is easier said than done.

Zhan-ge is a very handsome guy. He knows how to present himself well with his professional, clean-cut appearance and neat hair, and he cuts a fine, tall figure in his sharp, sleek suits. He’s also articulate and good-natured, quite charming all around, so obviously, Yibo is not the only one to have noticed how attractive he is. He’s liked by everyone at the agency from assistants to senior staff and has a reputation for being amiable and helpful with anyone.

So, of course, it drives Yibo crazy when Xiao Zhan catches the attention of half the single women at the office. He knows Zhan-ge isn’t _even_ trying, isn’t even aware half the time that others’ interest in him are more than friendliness, let alone encourage it. He’s just so decent and utterly good-looking that people fall for him left and right (Yibo included so he really shouldn’t judge).

Still, he can’t help the scowl that takes over whenever he sees young assistants talk to Xiao Zhan with smitten looks on their faces or giggling office ladies casually brush his arm more often than necessary. Ling-jie has noticed his moodswings and mistaken it as jealousy of Xiao Zhan’s easy charm, teasing him that he shouldn’t compare himself to Zhan-ge, that they’re two different types with their own separate appeal: Yibo the gorgeous, dreamy idol and Xiao Zhan the handsome, mature professional. Yibo is the stuff of fantasies while Zhan-ge is perfect boyfriend material, she explains, which doesn’t help Yibo’s jealousy at all.

He hates that others can openly flirt with and touch his boyfriend when he can’t even stand too close to Xiao Zhan in public without Xiao Zhan freaking out that someone will recognize their height similarities (a viable concern). He hates that the female staff all know of “the hot PR guy” and call _his_ boyfriend “Zhanzhan” among themselves, and he sees red whenever they flirtatiously invite Xiao Zhan out for coffee or an after-work group dinner. It’s small consolation that Xiao Zhan always politely declines, too busy with his responsibilities, when Yibo himself can’t even take his boyfriend out to a restaurant—or anywhere outside of a work setting really. It’s the absolute worst that he can’t mark his claim on Xiao Zhan to show the world he’s off-limits.

To make things worse, when he does happen to be at the office, Xiao Zhan is always stressed, too busy fielding journalists’ calls or devising media strategy to have time for him. The second time Yibo pulls him into a closet for a make out session, Xiao Zhan catches his hands and tells him, “We can’t keep sneaking around like this in the middle of the day. What if someone notices us?”

The rejection is crushing, even though he knows Xiao Zhan is just being practical. It’s enough to kill his desire to make out with his boyfriend. Withdrawing, he turns to leave before Xiao Zhan can see his disappointment but Xiao Zhan pulls him back by the waist.

“I’m sorry, baobei. It’s not that I don’t want to. I’m just trying to be careful,” he says into his ear, apologetic.

“I know,” Yibo says honestly and opens the closet door.

He keeps his hands to himself at the office after that even though he itches to touch Zhan-ge. He doesn’t want to be a bother and give him an unnecessary headache though, so despite his yearning, he bears with the distance without a fuss.

He thinks he’s not managing too badly to keep his cool until Pei-shushu chides him in the middle of expertly drawing a cateye stroke on his eyelid, “I said look down, not at those two behind me.”

Flustered at getting caught, Yibo guiltily drops his gaze from the woman huddling with Xiao Zhan over a tablet.

“Don’t worry, she’s not interested in him,” the makeup artist tells him.

He thinks Yibo likes the girl. “I’m not into her,” Yibo corrects him, scoffing.

“I know.” His reply is as dry as the desert.

Jaw dropping, Yibo gapes like a fish at Pei-shushu’s neat goatee and thick frames. “How do you know?”

The man shrugs, nonchalant. “I’ve been in this industry longer than you’ve been alive. For what it’s worth, he’s more obvious than you.”

Yibo knows he means Xiao Zhan but doesn’t understand how when Yibo is beside himself and Xiao Zhan won’t even look at him or talk to him.

“He avoids you like the plague but has no qualms talking to those girls with crushes on him,” Pei-shushu explains, wise and patient. “In this industry, hugs and kisses mean there’s nothing to hide. It’s when people avoid each other as obviously as you two that something’s going on. Now look down and hold still.”

\-----

Despite what Pei-shushu says, Yibo doesn’t believe Xiao Zhan is quite that affected.

But if Xiao Zhan doesn’t know what he’s missing, Yibo is going to _show_ him what he’s missing. Motivated to draw a reaction out of Xiao Zhan, he seizes every opportunity at the office to rub it in his face what he’s ignoring.

In a photoshoot for a homegrown designer’s new collection, Yibo decides against the outfits he and Ling-jie had already picked out and instead opts for the more risqué options of that season: a billowy-sleeved shirt made of silk organza, whatever that means, that is almost see-through and a pair of fitted lamb leather pants that lengthen his long legs even more. Ling-jie raises an eyebrow at his selection but doesn’t object to the provocative look.

He plays up his lean, leather-clad legs even more with the photographer, knows what angle to make them look even more striking. He knows just what an enticing sight he makes with his tousled hair and his nipples and abs peeking tantalizingly through the sheer fabric.

But when he chances a glance at Xiao Zhan in the corner of the shoot, his boyfriend isn’t even paying attention, busy in conversation with several execs. Yibo isn’t giving up easily though. Just for good measure, he texts Xiao Zhan a couple of the best shots so far.

Later he has a commercial to shoot for Yamaha. It’s a standard motorcycle commercial—pose on and off the bike, say a few lines, mimic riding a bit but the actual scenic rides will be performed by a stuntman. But Yibo takes to straddling the motorcycle with vigour, folds forward to show off the elegant line of his spine and the curve of his ass. He’s a natural on a bike, knows how to look good being on one, and if the way he’s straddling the motorcycle is more suggestive than the cool, sporty look they’re going for, no one says anything. When he takes off his helmet, he makes sure to tip his head in a way that bares his long, pale neck.

Still though, when Yibo glances over, Xiao Zhan is in the middle of a call, probably with a pushy reporter judging by his agitation. He’s clearly not paying attention, but Yibo isn’t discouraged. He’s got more tricks up his sleeve.

He usually practices his routines at home leaving the office dance studios for others’ rehearsals, but as his condo is off-limits for now, he books an empty dance space for a couple hours. That the PR department is just around the corner not ten meters away is purely coincidental.

Playing the pounding music at near full volume, he pulls out every dance trick that exudes sex appeal. He moves like liquid sex, thrusting his hips, and even gets on his knees to grind against the dancefloor. Before long, as expected, he amasses a small crowd of onlookers by the door. Xiao Zhan isn’t among them from what he can see through the glass wall, but Yibo is confident he’ll eventually pass by in the hall and take a peek at what everyone’s looking at.

Later when he’s washing his hands in the bathroom, Xiao Zhan appears out of nowhere to drag him into an empty stall.

Glowering, Xiao Zhan folds his arms over his chest. “Really?”

“What?” Yibo says innocently. “Is the music too loud? But you must be used to it having the dance studio close by.”

“You know what. I have a tough enough time as it is, I don’t need you making things harder by constantly shaking your ass.”

“You aren’t even looking at me. How am I supposed to know you’re paying attention when I shake my ass?” Yibo says, smug.

Xiao Zhan is still glaring at him, but a smile tugs on his mouth. “You little brat. I don’t think anyone can ignore you even if they wanted to.”

Recalling Pei-shushu’s words about being obvious, Yibo says, “Well, if other people are looking, shouldn’t you look too to not raise suspicion?”

Xiao Zhan shakes his head at his smartass comment, smiling. “Don’t tempt me. You know we have to keep up a front for others.”

Safe in the confines of the stall, he wraps his hands around Yibo’s waist and nuzzles his cheek. Then whispers hotly into Yibo’s ear, “It won’t do to make me bend you over the nearest desk and fuck you with your clothes on in front of everyone, will it?”

Yibo gasps at the imagery, body flushing hot as his dick gives a twitch. He shoves Xiao Zhan away, glaring. Now he’s going to be contending with the idea of being held down over a desk for the whole day.

It’s Xiao Zhan’s turn to be smug. “Now you see what it’s like when your boyfriend tries to give you an erection with your boss in the room? You little menace.”

\-----

Yibo lasts just over ten days of staying away from his boyfriend outside of work before he cracks like an addict going through withdrawal.

Normally, ten days goes by like nothing with how packed his schedule is. It’s not unusual that he works more days straight than can be counted on several hands before he even realizes it.

But each day he doesn’t get to see Xiao Zhan drags forever, and the meagre times he sees his boyfriend at the office isn’t enough to satiate him. This imposed distance is driving him out of his mind.

He’s fully aware this frustration goes beyond the inconvenience of temporary separation.

It’s from almost twenty-three years of not getting any sex. He joined the agency at fifteen after all and has been under its watchful eye since. God, he feels like a loser every time he has to justify being a virgin, but given the pressure and surveillance he’s under he’s lucky to even be kissed—more than just the pity kiss on his eighteenth birthday from Yixuan too.

The sad truth is while he may be one of the most desirable male idols in the country, the furthest he’s gotten is second base. And now that he finally has Zhan-ge, the universe just has to cockblock him with this whole affair.

For God’s sake, he’s already slept with the man for weeks. Why is it this impossible to finally lose his virginity?

He’s on his back on the giant hotel bed moping like a loser, willing his phone to light up with a call from his boyfriend, when he finally makes up his mind.

When he rings the buzzer to Xiao Zhan’s apartment, it’s well after nine but there’s no answer. Xiao Zhan should be home by now, and he can’t be asleep already.

He stands awkwardly outside the apartment building wondering what to do before he hears an unsure “Yibo?” from behind him.

It’s Xiao Zhan, exhausted, his tie loose and suit jacket rumpled. He can’t possibly be coming from the office at this hour.

For one wild, jealous moment, Yibo thinks he’s given in to post-work dinner or drinks with the office ladies.

Xiao Zhan doesn’t look happy to see Yibo. “What are you doing here? What if someone sees you?” he demands sharply.

Yibo is stung. He’s not stupid; he took precautions, including a cab here. “I came to see you,” he says. “No one will recognize me like this.” He’s wearing a baggy, nondescript hoodie and a face mask, with a hat pulled low over his eyes.

“You look exactly like a celebrity trying to go incognito,” Xiao Zhan points out flatly.

Well, if he’s going to be this unappreciative of Yibo, Yibo might as well leave. “Fine, if you don’t want me here, I’m going!”

Xiao Zhan catches his arm, his demeanour completely changing. “No, stay, sweetheart. You came all this way and I want to see you. I’m sorry for snapping at you, I’m just stressed out from work.” He makes quick work of getting them inside, not letting go of Yibo the entire way to his apartment.

Once the front door is safely locked behind them, Xiao Zhan is on him, wrenching Yibo’s face mask off and kissing him like a drowning man. Yibo can forgive him for earlier with the way he’s desperately devouring Yibo.

“I missed you so much, baobei,” Xiao Zhan confesses in between open-mouthed kisses.

Yibo practically floats at the endearment. “I missed you too,” he says, happy to let himself be ravaged by Xiao Zhan’s tongue and groped all over by needy hands.

Somehow Xiao Zhan maneuvers them to the couch without breaking apart, pulls Yibo down to straddle over his lap.

“This week has been hell,” Xiao Zhan says in a break from kissing, running his hands over Yibo’s thighs. His frustration spills out in a rush. “Some sponsors are threatening to pull out because of the negative publicity. Legal is trying to convince them those rumours are false and completely unsubstantiated without reminding them pulling out would be a breach of contract. But they just don’t want to be associated with those claims. Really though, me, a mobster? All because of a suit? And how could I be a sugar daddy when you make twenty times the average salary?”

Yibo smirks down at him. “You’re right, _I_ should be the sugar daddy. You can be my sugar baby. Have sex with me and I’ll buy you whatever you want.”

Xiao Zhan laughs. “So charming. How can I refuse such an offer? Hm, I could do with a new car.”

Yes, while Xiao Zhan’s car is old and reliable, obviously well cared for, he could do with something nicer. “What do you prefer, German or Italian?”

Xiao Zhan lets out another laugh, this time in disbelief, and nuzzles his neck. “I was joking. Don’t make me worried by going around offering brand new cars to whoever will fuck you.”

“Just you,” Yibo promises. “I’d give you whatever you want.”

Xiao Zhan groans against his throat as his fingers dig into Yibo’s thighs. “Keep talking like that and I won’t be able to control myself.”

Oh. Yibo goes tongue-tied, hot all over at the prospect of Xiao Zhan losing control. Quick, what can he say to keep this going?

Xiao Zhan misinterprets his sudden stillness. “Oh baby, it’s okay. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want. Tell me if I’m going too fast.”

“No! I want to,” Yibo hurriedly assures him. But he should probably warn him first about his inexperience before Xiao Zhan learns it the hard way and Yibo dies of humiliation.

He doesn’t know how to say it without being direct and awkward and killing the mood though. Admitting he’s a virgin outright sounds off-putting even to his own ear, and he knows he can be pretty tone-deaf sometimes. Should he go ahead with it or keep up the bluff as much as he can?

God, he knows how to move like he’s dripping with sex on the dancefloor, but when it comes to the real thing, he doesn’t know the first thing about seducing someone.

Maybe he should just keep up the act that this isn’t completely foreign to him after all. How hard can sex be when it’s a natural part of human behaviour? He can just let Xiao Zhan take the lead and follow along.

…But then again, if he messes up, he doesn’t want Xiao Zhan to think he’s bad at sex. He’s a fast learner, particularly when it comes to moving his body in novel ways, but Xiao Zhan isn’t going to know that he can pick things up quickly—he’ll probably just think Yibo is hopeless in bed if he doesn’t know better by now.

Probably better that Xiao Zhan has realistic expectations going into this.

“Zhan-ge,” he starts.

Xiao Zhan barely grunts. His face is pressed against Yibo’s neck, his breathing soft and tickling Yibo’s Adam’s apple. Slow and even. His hands are resting on Yibo’s thighs, no longer gripping with desperation.

Yibo groans and covers his face with his hands.

Now this is a new level of pathetic. He’s successfully put his boyfriend to sleep while freaking out about sex for the first time.

He extracts himself from Xiao Zhan and gingerly lays him down on the couch. From the lines of exhaustion on his face, Xiao Zhan really needs the rest. Yibo carefully removes his suit jacket and tie and undoes his belt and peels off his pants too. Then he tucks a blanket over Xiao Zhan and kisses his poor, overworked boyfriend goodnight, feeling such deep fondness that he doesn’t mind going to bed alone that night.

The next morning he’s gently awoken by an already dressed Xiao Zhan, suit pressed and every hair combed in place. He looks rested though he’ll probably need a full week off to fully erase the fatigue.

“Baobei, it’s time for me to go to work now.” He smiles sweetly down at Yibo. “I’m sorry I passed out on the couch last night. I would’ve liked to spend the time with you. Anyway, breakfast is on the table. Have a good day, sweetheart.” Xiao Zhan kisses his forehead.

Yibo falls back asleep with his lips curled.

\-----

Although he knows Xiao Zhan won’t approve of him coming over often, if at all, Yibo goes over to Xiao Zhan’s apartment the next time he has the evening off. He’s careful to take the cab to Xiao Zhan’s from the hotel, never straight from the agency in case of stalkers, and he wears unrecognizable clothing like before.

Xiao Zhan is home this time and, as expected, isn’t enthused he came over.

He’s in the middle of cooking, an activity Yibo always appreciates watching him do, probably due to some hardwired male instinct to like the sight of your partner in an apron.

His boyfriend brandishes a spatula at Yibo when he steps in. “You can’t keep doing this. What if someone followed you?”

“I made sure no one followed me, okay? No one knows I’m staying at the hotel.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do. There would be people hanging around the hotel if my stay there was leaked. I would never give you away to the public. Anyway, don’t you want to see me?” Yibo can’t help the hurt laced in his voice.

“Oh sweetheart, of course I do,” Xiao Zhan says, sternness melting away. “But we— _I_ let down my guard once and look what happened. I’m not going to let anything stupid happen to damage your career from now on.”

Yibo knows Xiao Zhan feels responsible for this mess and is just watching out for him, but still, doesn’t he want to spend time with Yibo? “I missed you. Didn’t you miss me?” he asks, meek.

Xiao Zhan sighs. “Of course, baobei.” He turns the stove off and takes off his apron before he goes to Yibo, pulling him in for a searing kiss. He squeezes Yibo into his chest, his arms coming around Yibo’s waist protectively, crushing the bulge in Yibo’s sweater pocket.

Xiao Zhan raises both eyebrows at the unopened bottle of lube he retrieves from Yibo’s pocket to Yibo’s embarrassment. “Look what we have here. Did you come over for that reason? I’m going to think you just want me for my body,” Xiao Zhan teases.

“Just being prepared,” Yibo mumbles, his face aflame. He really didn’t come here just for that, but if things took a steamier turn, he isn’t going to be caught off-guard and blow his chance. Xiao Zhan likely has his own supply of condoms and lube, but he doesn’t want to think about what—who—Xiao Zhan was using them for.

Xiao Zhan peppers his warm cheeks with kisses. “If that is what my dear baobei wishes, then who am I to deny him?”

Then into Yibo’s ear, his voice dropping into a husky whisper, he says, “First, I’m going to finish cooking dinner. You will eat every bite of it because I know what you eat when you’re by yourself. Then I’m going to _fuck_ you.”

The promise has Yibo shivering and his knees weak.

He waits obediently at the small kitchen table, too afraid to speak in case he jinxes something and things deviate from the promised course, while Xiao Zhan goes back to handling the wok like a pro. 

The tofu and vegetables smell and taste great that Yibo doesn’t mind the dish is full of green beans and peppers. Yibo wolfs down his bowl of rice and the stir-fry in record speed, eager to get dinner over with. Xiao Zhan’s cooking is good as always, but Yibo just wants to move on to the next part, which Xiao Zhan can tell, amused.

As soon as the dishes are washed and put away, Yibo pounces, herding Xiao Zhan into the bedroom. Xiao Zhan laughs at his eagerness and kisses him all over, hands running down the length of Yibo’s spine to firmly clutch their prize.

“You don’t know how hard it was, trying not stare at your ass while you prance around like sex on legs all week,” Xiao Zhan groans into his mouth, groping Yibo’s ass like it’s a marvel.

Yibo pushes him down to the bed, straddling him. Oh yes, sex is happening all right. “Well, it’s all yours now.” He quickly strips off his clothes.

Xiao Zhan raises his eyebrows at his lack of underwear. “You really came prepared, didn’t you?”

“I even showered back at the hotel,” Yibo confesses, tugging on Xiao Zhan’s shirt.

When they’re both naked, Yibo is hard and relieved to see that Xiao Zhan is too. Yibo’s mouth practically waters at the sight of Xiao Zhan’s cock, thick and glorious, and he really wants it in his mouth. But right now, he takes several moments to look his fill at his perfect specimen of a boyfriend.

As much as he loves Xiao Zhan in his sharp, tailored suits, Xiao Zhan looks even better naked.

Xiao Zhan has a wolfish grin on his face, looking absolutely rakish. Yibo didn’t know his sweet, gentle boyfriend could possibly get any sexier.

“What do you want, darling? I’ll give you anything you want,” Xiao Zhan promises, squeezing his ass.

Anything. He’ll happily take anything from Xiao Zhan. But before that—

Yibo is not going to make the same mistake as last time. “Zhan-ge, I need to tell you something,” he says, trying to sound like this is no big deal, like he isn’t about to drop a bomb.

Xiao Zhan stills, looks up at him kindly and patiently. “What is it?”

“I’ve never done this before,” Yibo confesses. “But I’m a quick learner, and I can make it good for you. I’ll do whatever you like,” he promises. He’s not going to admit that all he knows has come from porn.

He doesn’t expect to be pushed off or the sudden loss of Xiao Zhan’s warm skin.

Before he can panic too much, Xiao Zhan’s hands come to cradle his face gently. “Oh sweetheart, we don’t have to do anything you don’t want.” His boyfriend is smiling softly now, no longer rakish. “We can take this as slow as you like. We can just kiss and touch.”

No, that’s not what he means. He didn’t come this far only to lose his chance. “No, I want to! I want you to fuck me!” he almost shouts. “I just—” don’t want you to be disappointed if I do something wrong, but instead he says, “I just think you should know.”

“Baobei,” Xiao Zhan says sweetly. Yibo doesn’t think he will ever tire of hearing Xiao Zhan call him that. “It’s all right. I just want to make you feel good, that’s all I care about. Tonight is all about you. Now tell me, what would you like?”

“Can I suck your dick?” Yibo blurts out gracelessly. He can’t stop thinking about learning its taste and feeling its weight on his tongue and wants to see how far down his throat he can take it. Then, just to make things clear, “I want you to fuck me tonight.”

Xiao Zhan groans at his enthusiasm, obliging him. He shifts backward so he’s resting against the headboard, his long legs bracketing Yibo. Yibo crawls forward and grabs the base of his dick. He doesn’t bother with small licks, instead eagerly engulfing the whole length in his mouth.

The heady scent of Xiao Zhan knocks through his senses like a tidal wave, and Xiao Zhan’s dick feels so hot and heavy on his tongue. Yibo knows to mind his teeth, but Xiao Zhan’s girth is too much and tears prickle his eyes. The tip of his cock strikes the back of Yibo’s throat, and Yibo gags out of instinct, pulling away embarrassed and unable to look at Xiao Zhan.

But Xiao Zhan’s hand flies to the side of his face, comforting and reassuring. “Easy, darling. Take it slow.” He gently guides Yibo’s mouth back over his cock, shiny and wet with spit. “You look so beautiful like this, baobei. God, it’s like your lips are made for this.”

The praise has Yibo preening, eager to please him further. He runs his tongue along the underside of Xiao Zhan’s dick and is proud of the hiss he elicits. Emboldened, he relaxes his throat and gently lowers his mouth over the stiff shaft.

Xiao Zhan’s erection fills his mouth in the most delicious way. Eyes fluttering shut, he starts bobbing his head slightly, enjoying how the thick cock stretches his mouth and glides between his lips.

Xiao Zhan hisses in pleasure and when Yibo looks up, his boyfriend is watching him, pupils dilated.

Yibo bobs faster, encouraged, and thinks he’s doing well from his boyfriend’s groaning until Xiao Zhan’s hand abruptly pulls him off. Startled, he thinks he did something wrong, but Xiao Zhan just throatily instructs him to get on his stomach.

Eagerly, he scrambles to obey, presenting his backside. Xiao Zhan moves behind him, his hands spreading his asscheeks, and marvels in delight at what he sees, “Look at you. So lovely.”

When something warm and wet touches his asshole, Yibo jumps like a fish, gasping. A comforting hand caresses his flank but Xiao Zhan’s tongue remains pressed between his cheeks.

Yibo mewls as Xiao Zhan licks him, tongue stroking his rim and darting inside. It isn’t long before Yibo is sobbing into the pillow, his hips held in place by an arm across his lower back, as Xiao Zhan enthusiastically eats him out.

“Zhan… Zhan…” Yibo can barely breathe, trembling all over, his entire world narrowed to the sensation of having his ass devoured by Xiao Zhan’s tireless tongue.

Just when he thinks he’s about to blow from grinding against the bed and being eaten out, Xiao Zhan is gone. Alarmed, he looks over his shoulder to see his boyfriend getting off the bed. But he just rifles through their clothes until he finds the bottle of lube Yibo brought, then climbs back into bed and tells Yibo to flip over this time.

Yibo is all too happy to oblige, bringing his knees up on either side of Xiao Zhan, his heart palpitating with anticipation as he watches his boyfriend generously squeeze lube into his hands and warm it. He’s about to be fucked now for real. When his boyfriend slips his lube-coated fingers into his now wet and loosened hole, he bucks at the odd sensation of being breached for the first time.

Xiao Zhan takes his time working him open, murmuring how beautiful he looks and how good he’s being for him. He’s on his second finger when Yibo loses his patience.

“Just put it in already,” he snaps.

Xiao Zhan ignores him but scissors his fingers, making Yibo whine.

When his boyfriend finally gets to the main show, Yibo doesn’t know how much longer he can hold it. He might just end up spilling within a minute of Xiao Zhan’s cock inside.

But despite all of Xiao Zhan’s careful preparation, when he grips the base of his dick and lines it up with Yibo’s now relaxed entrance, Yibo still feels the painful stretch of penetration. His eyes water as the blunt head presses past his tight rim. When Xiao Zhan pushes in, it’s like he’s being speared open.

Xiao Zhan stills instantly at his cry, peppering kisses all over his face and neck and caressing Yibo’s flagging erection. “Shh, darling. You’re doing so well, taking me so good. God, you’re so tight.”

“Keep going, Zhanzhan,” Yibo begs even as tears prickle his eyes. He wants Xiao Zhan inside even if it’s hard taking his size. “Fuck me.”

Xiao Zhan stubbornly doesn’t move though, so Yibo wraps his legs around his waist to slide him deeper inside. After some time to adjust, Xiao Zhan nudges his cock forward an inch, then another inch. When he’s finally fully sheathed inside him, he gives a small experimental jab, making Yibo gasp as his cock pushes against his inner walls.

Xiao Zhan starts off gentle, rocking in and out. The discomfort eventually subsides and gives way to pleasure. Every thrust sends sparks through Yibo’s body, making him keen shamelessly and eyes roll back. Xiao Zhan’s thrusts get deeper and faster, pulling almost all the way out before plunging back in with the force and frenzy of an animal. Yibo is reduced into a wailing, teary mess beneath him, his legs splayed over Xiao Zhan’s elbows.

Xiao Zhan’s dick pounding into him feels so amazing Yibo can’t even think straight. He’s so far gone, he isn’t even aware he’s screaming “Zhanzhan” over the obscene, squelching noises of their bodies. He now knows why they call it banging; it feels like a spot deep inside is being nailed over and over but it’s so good he doesn’t care.

The sensation is so overwhelming it isn’t long before it’s too much. He comes arching off the mattress, shooting into Xiao Zhan’s chest. Xiao Zhan follows suit not long after, groaning through his orgasm and collapsing on Yibo, smearing come between them.

“Zhanzhan, huh?” he pants out.

Yibo can hear the teasing smile in his voice and is relieved his face is hidden by his collarbone. For all his judgement of the office ladies, he’s now one of them.

Later in the afterglow, he snuggles in his boyfriend’s arms, relishing the novel sensation of someone’s come inside him.

“When all this attention is over,” he begins. “When they’re no longer watching us so closely, can we go on a trip together somewhere?”

“Do you have somewhere in mind or do you mean the kind of trip where we don’t leave the hotel room?” Xiao Zhan teases, nuzzling him.

Truthfully, either is fine. “I just want to be with you,” he says honestly. It doesn’t have to be somewhere far or exotic. He’s about to suggest showing him Luoyang before he realizes that’s too presumptuous.

“Darling, you know we have to be careful,” Xiao Zhan says in that gentle, reasonable tone he uses to dissuade others. “We have to think of your career and the risks.”

Undeterred, Yibo suggests, “Maybe we can go abroad then?” Somewhere where he can hold hands with his boyfriend without being recognized as an idol. “How about going skiing in Europe?”

“I’ve never skied before.”

“I can teach you! It’s easy.”

Xiao Zhan kisses his hand. “Baobei, let’s talk about this later.”

Well, it’s not a no.

With Xiao Zhan spooning him and their hands interlaced, Yibo falls asleep feeling at peace with the world.

The next day his ass is just as sore as expected, but luckily, he doesn’t have to dance. It hurts when he walks and sits, but he still practically glows all day. He’s sure everyone can tell his just-got-fucked face, but thankfully no one comments. Pei-shushu, bless the man, wordlessly blends concealer over the marks on his neck, though Yibo can hear the unspoken warning that this better not become a regular habit.

\-----

Xiao Zhan relents to Yibo popping up at his apartment after that. It’s not like he does it a lot—most of his evenings are occupied with shows or filming after all—and he’s always careful to be discreet.

His visits follow a general pattern by now: Xiao Zhan cooks dinner for them, they enjoy dinner together, and then they fuck.

Yibo gets his first blow job and comes in Xiao Zhan’s mouth before his boyfriend can get his third finger inside him. Xiao Zhan is always patient when preparing him, but it still hurts when he finally penetrates him with his dick. But once he’s loose enough, Xiao Zhan’s dick pistoling hard and fast into his ass feels so good he doesn’t care if the neighbours hear his screams. Yibo takes it on his back with his ankles over Xiao Zhan’s shoulders, Xiao Zhan marvelling at how flexible he is, and on his knees, ass in the air, his cries muffled by the pillow as he comes. He learns to ride Xiao Zhan’s cock too, balancing on all fours as he bounces on Xiao Zhan’s dick, anchored by Xiao Zhan’s grip on his hips.

Xiao Zhan is so passionate during sex that it throws Yibo off when he brushes him off at the office. How can Xiao Zhan be so intimate at night and then hours later treat him at work with all the professional nonchalance of colleagues? It’s disconcerting and eats at Yibo’s insecurity, makes him wonder more than once if maybe he’s imagining the depth of Xiao Zhan’s feelings. Maybe the sweet words are just part of sex after all and Yibo is believing what he wants to believe. Still, Yibo isn’t going to turn down what he’s getting.

“I shouldn’t be doing this,” Xiao Zhan muses into his hair once after a round of lovemaking.

“Hm? Do what?” Yibo mumbles into his chest, full of contentment even as his ass feels tender and used.

“Fucking you when I’m in charge of you. It’s incredibly inappropriate, not to mention completely unprofessional.” Xiao Zhan sounds guilty even as his arm is around Yibo’s shoulder.

Yibo tries not to let the sinking feeling in his gut ruin his time with his boyfriend. It is inappropriate for them to be together. Is Xiao Zhan finally coming to his senses and starting to regret things?

“Are you afraid you’ll lose your job?” he asks, then realizes what a dumb thing to say. Of course, who would want to lose their job?

But the question surprises Xiao Zhan. “No, I don’t care about that. I mean, I care about my job! But it’s not the end of the world if I have to find another job. In fact, that’s what I should be doing now. Would be doing now if I didn’t make this mess in the first place and now have to clean it up.”

Yibo feels a bit better that apparently when it comes down to between Yibo and his job, Xiao Zhan would choose him.

“I’m in a position of authority,” Xiao Zhan explains. “I can’t be doing this. I’m basically _taking advantage_ of you.”

Taking advantage? Yibo almost scoffs at the outrageous idea. If anything, Yibo is the one taking advantage of Zhan-ge’s kind, sweet nature, pushing him to spend more and more time together. Xiao Zhan gives an inch and Yibo seizes a mile, to the extent of sharing a bed and wearing his clothes.

Instead, he reasons with Xiao Zhan, “You and I both know you can’t make me do anything I don’t want to.”

“Don’t remind me what a sucker I am for you,” Xiao Zhan replies, the corner of his mouth twitching.

“In fact, I’m the one always making you do what I want. I’m the star here, and you work for me. If anything, you can’t refuse my demands without risking your job.” When put that way, Yibo kind of feels bad for always coercing Xiao Zhan and getting his way.

Xiao Zhan shakes his head, disagreeing. “No, it’s me who’s taking advantage. In a way, you can’t fully consent when I have so much control over your career and public image—”

“Oh, shut up, Zhanzhan,” Yibo huffs, not caring he’s being rude. He’s had enough of hearing how they’re wrong for each other. “I want you just as much as you want me, if not more. So stop saying that you’re taking advantage of me like I’m some dumb idol who doesn’t know better!”

Xiao Zhan kisses his head to mollify him. “Okay, baobei. Hm, but it doesn’t solve what I’m going to do after this.”

Yibo is relieved at the change of subject. “You don’t need to find another job right away.” Yibo makes way more than enough for both of them, obviously, but even he knows it’s too early to raise that.

“What am I going to do without a job then?” Xiao Zhan muses. “Bake and paint all day?”

Yibo can think of several things he can do with his free time. “You can fuck me whenever.” He steadfastly keeps his eyes averted. “Or something.”

Xiao Zhan laughs a deep, rich laugh. “I don’t know if I can keep up with your demands.”

“I’ll go easy on you.”

“Hm, baking, painting, and fucking you whenever I want. What a tempting life. How can I possibly resist?” He’s smiling into Yibo’s hair.

The earlier tension has all but evaporated, so Yibo counts it as a victory.

\-----

Just because they can’t see each other outside of work doesn’t mean they can’t see each other during work. Despite his penchant for manhandling Yibo into closets or bathroom stalls for privacy, Xiao Zhan will freak out if Yibo tries to corner his boyfriend for some rejuvenating midday groping. But Xiao Zhan can’t protest if Yibo keeps his hands to himself and behaves like a normal colleague. Like coaxing him into a forty-five-minute lunch with him.

It takes some needling, not only because of Xiao Zhan’s workload but also concerns they’ll be seen in public. Yibo has to assure him it’s a local noodle house near the office frequented by agency staff anyway, so they won’t be out of place or even the only agency employees there. Officially, to the world, Wang Yibo is simply having noodles with his manager.

They order bowls of beef noodle soup, and Yibo can’t help but feel sappy and excited—it’s like their first date really, as it’s the first time they’re out together for a non-work-related purpose. Until now, they’ve always spent time together at one of their places.

“Some good news. The sponsors are finally coming to their senses about those rumours. They’re starting to realize that all the attention on you isn’t entirely unfavourable and capitalizing on that. It’s not true that no publicity is bad publicity, but it applies here—you’re one of the most talked about things on social media. Or rather, I am.” Xiao Zhan smiles ruefully. “I never thought I’d one day be trending on Weibo. Too bad it’s nothing I can brag about. God, if management ever finds out who ‘Wang Yibo’s mystery man’ is, I just might give my boss a heart attack.”

Yibo isn’t going to pretend he hasn’t been keeping tabs on the rumours and gossip about Xiao Zhan’s identity.

“Did you see the blogs dedicated to figuring out all the clues of your existence? I wear a ring, and people think it’s a gift from you. I buy a present for my mom, and people think it’s you I’m shopping for. I make a speech thanking all the special people in my life for their support at an award show several months ago, and people think we’ve been together since then.” There’s even speculation about the exact cause of a slight limp Yibo got from a bad landing when skateboarding, but Yibo isn’t going to share that.

In fact, there are even discussions about their _sex life_ in salacious detail, which Yibo devours with shameless delight, but he’s not about to enlighten Xiao Zhan. Xiao Zhan doesn’t need confirmation of how little people believe the official story that this mystery lover is just an unconnected fan.

“Oh, and there’s a theory now that you’re a rival agent trying to seduce me away to your company. You must prefer that over the gangster theory.”

Xiao Zhan rolls his eyes. “People really have too much imagination,” he says drily. “They’re going to be so disappointed if they find out I’m just a regular PR guy.”

“Hey! What if I want a tough gangster boyfriend?”

“Sweetheart, I hate to tell you but you’ve got the _wrong_ guy.”

“Well, they’re coming up with better stories than what you’re spinning!”

Xiao Zhan balks. “Excuse me. Who am I doing all this for, huh?”

Yibo grins cheekily, feeling so buoyant he can float like a balloon. He’s so happy that he’s out with his boyfriend, even if it’s under the guise of a professional relationship. Which reminds him.

“If you’re not interested in skiing, we can just go sightseeing. Maybe see the museums of Europe—like that weird, crazily-shaped one. You’d love that, wouldn’t you?” Xiao Zhan would be into that. Yibo could care less about contemporary art, but he’s willing to endure looking at weird, indistinguishable objects for his boyfriend. If that makes him whipped, so be it.

Xiao Zhan smiles. “The Guggenheim. Still thinking of going away?”

“I just want to go out with you without ending up on front page news,” Yibo says honestly.

Xiao Zhan goes quiet.

“Baobei, about that,” he begins after a moment, setting his chopsticks aside.

Yibo stills.

“You know we can’t just take a trip somewhere as a couple. You’re very recognizable, even abroad. All it takes is just one Chinese tourist to notice you and snap a pic of you with me,” Xiao Zhan says reasonably.

Yibo knows he’s right, but it’s only an off chance that can happen and they can’t go around being paranoid about every little thing.

“Darling, we can’t,” Xiao Zhan insists, firm.

“Then let’s not go anywhere,” Yibo keeps his tone light. “We can just spend time together here. I have a race coming up in a few weeks. Will you come watch me?” It’ll be the first time he actually has someone he wants cheering for him in person—not even his parents can come in person to his races.

“A few weeks? That’s pretty soon. It might not be a good idea for me to show up with all the focus currently on you.”

“Oh, come on!” Yibo fights off his annoyance. “No one will even notice you or be paying attention to you. And even if someone sees you and me together, you’re my PR manager. No one will think it’s weird that you’re with me.”

“Do you invite Yu-jie to your races?”

“Of course not.” She’ll probably freak out that he’s going to crash. “Why would I bring her?”

“Exactly.”

Frustrated at how futile it is arguing with Xiao Zhan—his boyfriend can be incredibly stubborn despite his good humour—Yibo signals for the bill. He pays for their meal, of course, thrusting cash at the server before Xiao Zhan can beat him to it much to Xiao Zhan’s genuine annoyance.

“Who’s the gege around here?” Xiao Zhan chides. “Paying is my job.”

“Who’s the sugar daddy around here?” Yibo retorts just as fast, smirking. “Spoiling you is my job.”

Xiao Zhan comically whips his head around to see if anyone nearby has heard, then hisses, “Keep your voice down.”

“Please, what have we been talking about all this time?” Yibo says sarcastically. “You’re getting too paranoid. You’re just going to age yourself faster.”

Xiao Zhan swats him on their way out.

\-----

Yibo knows something is wrong by the third unknown call that hangs up as soon as he answers. By the sixth call, his suspicions are confirmed and he takes to redialling the number immediately. Shocked speechless, the embarrassed fans on the other end can barely mumble apologies when he politely asks them to stop sharing his number.

But his phone number being leaked to countless fans is the least of his problems.

“Be honest. What will they find on your phone?” Manager Wu is pinching the bridge of his nose. Xiao Zhan has his face in his hands.

“Nothing. I don’t have any inappropriate pictures,” Yibo promises, but it’s little comfort to the people in the room.

He’s had enough lectures on fame and appropriate behaviour drilled into him over the years to know how risky it is having explicit, scandalous material on his phone. There is nothing of the sort for hackers to find, though to be honest, it’s not like he _can_ get dirty pictures even if he wanted to—other celebrities (the smart ones, anyway) are just as paranoid about putting out compromising photos of themselves and he hardly meets regular people. As much of a relief that hackers have nothing on him, it’s no celebration that he _hasn’t_ received any dirty photos at twenty-two. And it sucks that Zhan-ge would never send him any, especially not after this.

“Text messages then. What can they get from your chat logs? We need to know what possible dirt they can get on you, so think carefully.”

Um, reminders from his parents to eat vegetables and take care of himself on his own? Dumb memes from his friends, both famous and from back home? There really isn’t anything damaging his hackers can find on his phone. No explicit photos, no sketchy contacts, no sexist, outrageous comments that have brought down bigger celebrities.

Even his texts to Xiao Zhan aren’t scandalous or incriminating. Their texts, if not work-related, are just friendly banter (after Yibo’s initial flirting attempts have failed). It’s Xiao Zhan’s work phone after all, and Yibo wouldn’t dare send him NSFW messages on a device anyone can see.

“What about that ‘boyfriend’ of yours from before?” another executive asks.

It’s the first time they’ve raised the subject after Yibo told them about having a boyfriend. Yibo had presumed they’d willfully forgotten about it after Xiao Zhan promised he’d convince Yibo otherwise.

Before Yibo can assure them he did not exchange dick pics or naughty texts, Xiao Zhan speaks up firmly. “No, there’s nothing like that.”

His boss is surprised by his certainty. “How do you know? How can you be sure of that?”

Smoothly, Xiao Zhan covers up his slip before it can be suspicious. “Uh, I made sure he understood the dangers when I talked him out of dating at this point in his career.”

“I promise there’s nothing inappropriate to worry about,” Yibo assures them honestly. He’s squeaky clean.

That seems to appease everyone and they proceed to discuss what to do.

The agency, thankfully, isn’t a stranger to privacy breaches—Yibo isn’t even their first idol hacked—and has a sophisticated system in place to handle data leaks and hacking. Still, he feels responsible for the emergency they now have to deal with.

Feeling guilty, he apologizes to everyone, “I’m sorry for this happening and the trouble I’ve caused.”

Surprisingly, Manager Wu waves it off. “It’s bound to happen eventually. You’re famous now, so it’s a question of when, not if, you’ll get hacked.”

“Besides,” Xiao Zhan adds, “with the spotlight on you and all the rumours and speculation surrounding you now, it makes sense some crazy fan would try to hack your phone to get some answers.”

“Well, they won’t find anything on me,” Yibo confirms to a room of relieved executives.

Famous last words.

\-----

Within a day, Yibo’s texts to his friends are published on the internet, and suddenly the public is privy to his embarrassing gushing about Zhan-ge.

Texts after texts are posted of Yibo raving about how great of a cook he is, how his soft-spoken words make Yibo melt, how good he is with his hands when dicing vegetables or giving massages, how multi-talented he is from painting to singing, how he always solves Yibo’s problems even when they’re small and stupid and just makes everything better somehow. His texts go on and on about how perfect Xiao Zhan is that for hours he can’t look his boyfriend in the eye out of embarrassment. Memes even pop up of his texts with captions like “Life goals: find a mate like this to grow old with,” “I wish I can find someone who loves me as much as Wang Yibo loves his man,” and “Ladies and gentlemen, behold what TRUE love looks like.”

It’s not the nude photo scandal he knows the world is salivating for—probably why he’s still alive—but it’s no less cringeworthy on his end.

The truth is undeniable now. The whole world now knows he’s got a boyfriend. Or at least someone he’s head over heels infatuated with.

“You said they wouldn’t find anything,” Manager Wu grouses, rubbing his temples.

“I meant nothing explicit or inappropriate,” Yibo says, faint with misery.

Manager Wu sighs then clears his throat. “Well, it can’t be helped now. The cat’s out of the bag. No one will believe us if we deny this.”

His pragmatic acceptance surprises Yibo.

“Don’t get me wrong, young man. You’ve still poured gasoline on your career and set it on fire. But it’s not the first time an idol gets into a relationship—or gets caught in one. You can thank your lucky stars that your young man at least hasn’t been revealed to the public.”

Remarkably, unbelievably, by some pure miracle there is nothing in his texts giving Xiao Zhan’s identity away. He hadn’t told anyone about their relationship like Xiao Zhan directed, but in practice he hadn’t needed to. His friends all know who he’s been crushing on but by some stroke of luck haven’t actually called Xiao Zhan by name. Ironically, it’s Xiao Zhan’s own earlier texts referring to “that guy you like” that cements the existence of a love interest to the public.

“But it may not be for long. Now the public is going to be out on a manhunt for your partner. He won’t be safe,” Manager Wu warns.

Xiao Zhan is grim, agreeing. “They’ve been speculating all this time and now that they have proof, they’re going to stop at nothing until they find him.” _Me_ , Yibo can hear.

Yibo doesn’t know what he can say to relieve him.

Yu-jie pipes up, concerned. “Who is he, Yibo? How established is he in his career? Maybe we can use his popularity to our advantage.”

She’s trying to be positive, but Yibo can tell another executive thinks otherwise, probably calculating the fallout of two big stars having their relationship revealed. He doesn’t know if it’s better or worse that his partner isn’t a fellow idol. “He’s not famous,” Yibo softly admits, carefully not looking at Xiao Zhan. “He’s just an ordinary person.”

Someone tsks with disapproval. “Then he won’t be used to the public focus when it comes. It will be difficult for him to deal with all the attention.”

“What should we do?” Yibo fights down the panic. Xiao Zhan doesn’t deserve to be hunted by the press and have his life turned upside down because of him.

“What can we do? We’ve already tried denying this. No one will believe us now if we stick with the same statement. Even if we came out with this and revealed the truth on our terms, it still means your young man will have his privacy invaded.” Manager Wu gives him a stern look. “If only you’d listened to us when we warned you about having a relationship, you might have spared him this ordeal.”

“That’s not fair,” Xiao Zhan protests. “This guy knew what he was getting into dating an idol.”

It’s kind of Xiao Zhan to defend Yibo. But Yibo knows they’re right.

“What do I need to do?” he asks the executives in the room.

They seem to take pity on him. “For now, keep away from him, for his sake if not yours.” Then, in a kinder tone, “It’s not the first fire of this kind we’ve put out.”

\-----

While Xiao Zhan is occupied with marathon discussions of how to proceed, Yibo does his own damage cleanup with his stomach in knots. He apologizes to his friends for having their private messages publicly disclosed and having to change their phone numbers as a result. His kind, wonderful friends respond with support, sympathizing with his phone hack and the unwanted reveal. With his parents, he assures them he’s okay even if he feels otherwise and that the agency is taking care of everything. He deliberately avoids his mom’s concerned _Since when do you have a boyfriend? Why didn’t you tell Mama?_ With the way things are going, he’s not even sure if he’ll have one much longer.

The truth is none of this is what he doesn’t already know. Have known for years too. The entertainment industry is cruel and shallow but his agency has never misrepresented its ugliness or misled him. Dating, having a relationship, falling in love—they’re off-limits to an idol for good reason. Idols are in the business of selling fantasies through their music, choreography, and flawless visuals. Dating someone ruins the fantasy for millions. Fans’ hearts will break and they’ll move on to the next new idol they can safely dream about. Yibo knows perfectly well the risks to his career, understands that his popularity will drop as grieving fans forget about him, and then he won’t be signing contracts for dramas anymore.

And he knows the risks to the other party too, whether they’re a celebrity or not. Yibo comes with baggage. All celebrities do no matter how well-adjusted they are, hence why they commonly marry each other. It has nothing to do with vanity or shallowness despite what society likes to think but instead assurance that someone understands their baggage and has their own to contend with.

Dating Yibo goes beyond challenging. It means sacrifice: of a private life, of a normal relationship, of reasonable expectations from a partner. Even if Yibo wants to give Xiao Zhan whatever he wants, he knows realistically there will be inevitable times when their relationship has to take a backseat to his career.

He doesn’t doubt that Xiao Zhan understands the hardships of being in a relationship with a celebrity, but thinking you can deal with it is one thing. Actually experiencing it is another. Xiao Zhan is never going to be safe from the press or the public. He’s going to have his privacy violated, and, once exposed, his nice, simple life will be thrown into upheaval just for being romantically associated with Yibo. He’ll inherit Yibo’s crazy, jealous fans, maybe a vengeful stalker or two, and enough media attention to drive three regularly functioning people insane.

But Xiao Zhan probably _would_ put up with it all because he’s a nice person. He’s too good to dump someone just because it’s too hard dating them. He’ll likely bear with the difficulties in the name of love and overcompensate for Yibo’s relationship shortcomings, maybe force himself to be satisfied with a relationship that brings him chaos.

Yibo can’t do that to him. Even if he wants to be with him so much.

Looking back, the last several weeks have been nothing short of a whirlwind romance. He’d been high on the thrill and wonder of being with Xiao Zhan, of experiencing many firsts—first boyfriend, first time, first relationship—that he’d all but ignored the very thing that kept him from pursuing Xiao Zhan in the first place: the risk of ruining his life.

But Yibo doesn’t think he can bear to let Xiao Zhan go. Xiao Zhan is so good and kind, and he makes Yibo so, so happy. How can Yibo find the selflessness to give up the best thing to happen to him?

When the knock on his hotel door comes, he thinks it must be a mistake as he didn’t order any room service. But when he answers the door, a weary Xiao Zhan with bags under his eyes comes in and collapses on the hotel couch, surprising him. He didn’t know Xiao Zhan even knew what suite he’s staying in as he hasn’t come visited.

“Baobei,” Xiao Zhan all but groans, running his hands through his now mussed hair. “Today has been awful.”

Filled with sympathy, Yibo puts a comforting hand on his arm. “Have you figured out what to do?”

“No. And the longer we wait before releasing a statement, the more it reinforces that they’ve got it right. The best thing to do is to control the narrative instead of letting others tell it first and we can’t do that without revealing my identity.” Xiao Zhan sighs. “I feel like I’m lying to them keeping up with this charade.”

Of course, it’d be difficult juggling Yibo’s PR affairs and pretending he’s not the cause of it all. Yibo recalls that conversation where Xiao Zhan expressed regret about how wrong it is for him to date Yibo. Xiao Zhan is the ever consummate professional, so of course this wouldn’t sit right with him. And he wouldn’t even be in this position if it weren’t for Yibo.

“I’m sorry, Zhanzhan.”

Xiao Zhan shrugs. “Like we said before, it’s not your fault you got hacked. It was going to happen sooner or later. Most major celebrities get hacked at some point or another in their careers.”

“No, that’s not what I mean. I’m sorry that you have to keep hiding our relationship and lying to everyone,” he says quietly.

“Oh darling.” Xiao Zhan takes his hand and kisses it. “It’s not your fault. I told you before that no one knows the challenges of dating a celebrity better than me. I knew what I was getting into, and I never expected it to be easy. But I chose this because I want to be with you.”

Yibo wishes he can feel the same confidence.

“We just have to be extra careful for now,” Xiao Zhan assures him, though Yibo can tell even he doesn’t know how long that means.

\-----

Yibo lies low as instructed. Not that he wasn’t before, but now he avoids going into the office if he can and when he does, he tries not to see Xiao Zhan more than necessary. The PR team can’t reach a consensus on how to explain his relationship status, so they just issue the standard condemnation about breaching a person’s privacy for now and request the public respect Yibo’s personal life. All his interviews are rescheduled and he dutifully gives non-answers whenever pushy reporters accost him outside.

Xiao Zhan has noticed his withdrawnness of late and attributes it, understandably, to the privacy breach. He tries to explain that although Yibo may be badly shaken, this rarely happens more than once and Yibo has survived this incident relatively unscathed. There is nothing scandalous and damaging unveiled after all, and actually his sweet, adoring messages have endeared the public to him. But Yibo has accepted early on that hacking incidents like this are part and parcel of fame, and he can’t help but wonder if Xiao Zhan can take it so pragmatically if it were to happen to him.

Despite how busy he is, Xiao Zhan tries to cheer Yibo up because he’s a good, caring boyfriend. Yibo must be really pathetic if Xiao Zhan actually takes the time out of his crammed schedule to bake Yibo a small cake and makes an allowance for Yibo breaking his diet. Yibo can’t bear to eat it though in case he falls even more for the man. Instead he leaves it out for office staff to enjoy, letting them think it’s from a fan, and avoids Xiao Zhan’s questioning eyes.

Eventually, Xiao Zhan raises his concern one evening at Yibo’s hotel suite. “Baobei, what’s wrong? You can’t still be this upset about the phone hack. What’s been bothering you lately?”

It’s probably about time Yibo voiced this. It’s been on his mind nonstop, and, truthfully, he’s almost come to a decision.

Or, well, he knows intuitively what should be done. He just can’t bring himself to do it.

“Zhanzhan,” he begins, unable to meet Xiao Zhan’s eyes. “Where do you think this is going?”

Xiao Zhan gets what he’s referring to and is immediately on alert. Carefully, he answers, “Darling, this is just a difficult phase. It’s not always going to be like this.”

“How?! Where do you see us in a few months, a year or two down the line?” Yibo has to keep his voice restrained. “Still hiding from the public? Still sneaking around your apartment? Still lying to everyone we know?”

It seems so silly and naïve now that he actually once imagined that some day he could formally introduce Xiao Zhan as his official plus-one, could openly kiss him and dote on him in public, could weather any storm that came with fame with him by his side.

He doesn’t give Xiao Zhan a chance to respond. “It doesn’t matter how good we are at keeping this up. Eventually, it’s still going to come out.” And then you’re going to wish you hadn’t done this, he doesn’t say. That this isn’t worth all the trouble.

Xiao Zhan looks at him gravely. “It’s true your popularity may drop in the future, but the worst is already out there. If we manage it right, we can ensure that if everything comes out, the impact doesn’t exceed this.”

It takes a moment for Yibo to get what he’s talking about. No, that’s not what he means. He’s not worried about his career—it doesn’t make much difference now that the damage is already done. The most he can do now is keep it from happening to Xiao Zhan.

“No, I’m talking about you.” He might as well spell it out for him. “When this comes out, being fired is going to be the least of your problems.” Even though Yibo can’t actually imagine the agency firing him with how much management loves him.

He takes a deep breath and just goes for it. “I think we should just be friends. This way, they’re never going to find you if they look, and even if they somehow dig something up, we can say that it was in the past and no longer applies so they’ll leave you alone.”

They started off as friends after all—well, colleagues—and they can still keep their friendship even if Yibo will always want more. It’s what’s best for Zhanzhan. And actually, it’s what he’d originally resigned himself to being content with anyway. This way, Xiao Zhan can safely stay in his life, won’t have to lie to everyone and be breaching his professional ethics, and if the worst happens, well, the public won’t be interested in him any more if they’re no longer dating. It’s actually such a solid, foolproof plan he feels a bit ashamed he let his selfishness keep him from doing this earlier.

Xiao Zhan looks stunned after his explanation. “Are you breaking up with me for _my sake_?” He says it like it’s a crazy idea.

Not breaking up, just choosing to be friends. “It’s going to be less scandalous if it turns out we _dated_ instead of we’re _dating_. By then, people won’t care about you.”

“Baobei, you can’t do this.” Xiao Zhan is still talking like this is all absurd.

Trying not to take offence, Yibo doesn’t understand what’s so unreasonable about this. “You’re being hunted right now! They’re not going to stop, there’s always going to be speculation about who I’m seeing. Sooner or later they’re going to find out it’s you, and once you’re exposed, it’s too late.”

Xiao Zhan takes both his hands in his, pleading. “Baobei, listen to me. I’ve told you this before and I’ll say it a hundred times if I have to: _you are worth it_. I know exactly what I’m signing up for. I know it’s not going to be a normal, easy relationship, but I’m willing to deal with it because you’re not ‘normal’—you’re special, and not just because you’re an idol. I want you and I want to be with you, and that means I accept everything, good and bad, that comes with being with you.”

It’s a very nice, moving thing to say. Yibo swallows the lump in his throat and hopes the stinging in his eyes won’t overflow.

It’s a very Xiao Zhan thing to say. It’s just what Yibo expected: Xiao Zhan would put up with a difficult relationship because he’s too kind to leave someone when it’s not their fault. He’s too stubborn, and he’ll probably keep telling himself that Yibo is worth the hardship when Yibo isn’t. Will hang on to Yibo when he can just as easily have someone who gives him none of the trouble Yibo brings.

If Xiao Zhan isn’t going to get himself out of a disastrous situation, Yibo will have to be the one to do it for him. He’s not going to trap Xiao Zhan with him because the man is too loyal to abandon a partner even when he deserves something better.

Xiao Zhan is kissing his eyes then and Yibo lets himself be soothed.

\-----

Just because Xiao Zhan doesn’t want to break up—go back to being friends—doesn’t mean that Yibo is going to let things stay on this dangerous trajectory. It only takes one to change things, after all, even if Yibo doesn’t want to and puts it off.

Xiao Zhan is as sweet and attentive as always, more so after their conversation, and checks in several times a day as if to make sure Yibo is no longer harbouring any crazy ideas. Yibo prays that he can still have this communication after.

Yibo doesn’t think about how he’ll do it, but when the perfect opportunity to reach the wide public appears, he seizes it without hesitation, even though he knows it’s a low blow.

As standard procedure, the reporter has submitted the interview questions beforehand to be approved by Xiao Zhan. Of course, all questions related to his love life are off-limits, and reporters generally respect banned topics in the spirit of being granted interviews, but Xiao Zhan looms anxiously just outside camera view, ready to intervene if he deems the interview to encroach on forbidden territory. But the live interview remains strictly about promoting his upcoming drama, ironically a romcom about a professional motorcycle racer, and when it draws to a close and the reporter asks if he has any comments to viewers, Yibo politely takes her up on the offer.

“I do have something I want to clear up with everyone.”

“Oh? What would that be?” the reporter asks. From the edge of his vision, Yibo can see Xiao Zhan stiffen, poised to step in.

Hurriedly, he speaks before Xiao Zhan can do something to disrupt the interview. “There’s been a lot of focus on my relationship status lately.” The reporter’s eyes widen in surprise, but Yibo launches on. “And I just want to set the record straight once and for all.”

He clears his throat, looks still and straight into the camera, and says clearly, “As of now, I am single and not with anyone.”

Xiao Zhan freezes where he is.

“Some of you may not believe me given recent events. But what I’m saying now is true. The truth is I was with somebody. But now I’m not,” he finishes plainly, offering no detail.

Just to emphasize his point, he affirms, “We’re no longer together. So I would ask that you respect our privacy and please refrain from speculation.”

The reporter is shocked along with the crew. All is so stunned by his revelation that no one moves when he exits the recording room.

He doesn’t look at Xiao Zhan at all for the rest of the day.

\-----

For two agonizing days, no word comes from Xiao Zhan. Yibo wants so badly to reach out to Xiao Zhan but doesn’t want to disturb him if he doesn’t want to speak to Yibo at all.

He practically goes out of his mind wondering what Xiao Zhan thinks, what he feels, if they can still be friends or if Yibo really has singlehandedly ruined everything. He didn’t mean to be the villain and doesn’t want Xiao Zhan to hate him, but things couldn’t keep going the way they were.

On the third day, Yu-jie delivers the news.

Xiao Zhan has mysteriously resigned, effective immediately. He wouldn’t explain why, wouldn’t budge at any of the agency’s attempts to keep him, not even an offer of higher compensation—or to shuffle him to another idol, proof that the agency is loathe to lose him because of Wang Yibo.

Well, there is his answer. Announcing it on live TV is pretty despicable but even if it weren’t TV, it would’ve been something just as cruel and impersonal, like social media. He’d hoped to keep Xiao Zhan’s friendship, but if he’s lost Zhanzhan completely from his life, well, at least Xiao Zhan now has zero risk of being exposed along with all the other hazards of dating a celebrity.

“Do you have any idea why he’d do such a thing, Yibo?” Yu-jie asks, clearly stressed out. “Did something happen between you two?”

Yibo is thankful she’d called him so she wouldn’t see the guilt written on his face. He almost confesses that it’s all his fault but catches himself before it’s too late.

“Does it have to do with the interview a couple days ago?” Yu-jie probes when he doesn’t say anything.

He remains silent, doesn’t know how to answer that without giving things away. That seems to be confirmation enough anyway.

“Yibo,” Yu-jie says softly. “If you blame Zhan-ge for making you break up with that boyfriend of yours, you shouldn’t. It’s really not his fault. Whether you believe it or not, management cares about you and doesn’t want to see your career ruined because of some poor romantic entanglement. Zhan-ge is just acting on their wishes. He cares about you. We all do.”

Yibo almost laughs at how wrong and how _right_ she’s got it but just mumbles, “I know.”

Eventually, she gives up waiting when he doesn’t add anymore. “Well, it’s quite a shame. Everybody was sad to see him leave. Everyone liked him.” Even you, Yibo can hear it implied. “I wish the best for whatever comes next for him.”

Yibo wants nothing more too. “Me too,” he confesses to Yu-jie, this time relieved that she can’t see his moist eyes.

\-----

Yibo is in a state of despondence the rest of the week.

That weekend his motorcycle race takes place, the very one he’d hoped Xiao Zhan would attend and he’d be able to beam at his boyfriend from the podium, trophy in hand. Maybe dare to dedicate his win to him.

Now that dream seems so stupid and farflung.

Despite his genuine attempt to focus and perform well, he does even worse than he anticipated he would given his poor spirits. His turns are a tad too wide, his laps around the racetrack sloppy instead of streamlined. He places seventh, a far cry from the podium finish he originally imagined, even losing out to racers he’d previously beaten.

Even with his lacklustre finish, he still gets way more attention than the other racers, much to their envy and annoyance. A lot of fans have turned up, still mostly female but there are noticeably more males now, probably driven to show up by his confirmation that he’s now officially single. From their enthusiastic cheers, they’re obviously not put off by his less than impressive performance. There are a lot of reporters too, all eager to score a soundbite on what he said days earlier and whether that had to do with today’s poor results. After the race, they swarm him instead of the actual winners of the day.

He so does not want to talk to the press that he coldly brushes them off, not caring how rude he’s being. His impassive mask in place, he pushes through the mob of microphones and flashing lights, flat out ignoring their nosy questions of “Who were you dating?”, “How long were you together for?”, “How serious was the relationship?”, “What caused the breakdown?”

There are so many people and blinding camera flashes that he doesn’t notice someone tall and lean push through the crowds.

When he realizes that someone is walking towards him, he doesn’t recognize him right away.

When he does, he nearly loses his balance and trips in front of a crowd of probably forty reporters.

Xiao Zhan isn’t in one of his suits and his hair isn’t styled with wax like usually. Instead, he’s wearing regular clothes: a jacket, a sweater, and jeans that show off how long his legs are. He’s just as effortlessly handsome and looks, frankly, good—like he’s rejuvenated. Evidently, he really needed the time away from managing Yibo’s affairs.

Yibo watches helplessly, wordlessly, as Xiao Zhan strides right up to him. He doesn’t know what Xiao Zhan could possibly want with him, but does he really have to do this in front of forty members of the press?

Is Yibo really going to get his heart broken in front of forty members of the press?

Well, it’d only be what he deserves after delivering that on live TV.

He almost jerks back when Xiao Zhan’s hands come up to his face. Then thinks he’s finally gone insane and this is all an illusion when Xiao Zhan opens his mouth and says sweetly, “Well done, baobei.” Like his seventh-place finish is something to be proud of.

That this is all a hallucination conjured by his depressed, grieving mind is confirmed when Xiao Zhan kisses him right there, in broad daylight and full view of forty witnesses. It’s an incredibly convincing hallucination, even down to the feel of Xiao Zhan’s mouth, the soap he uses, the warm fingers cradling his jaw.

But it definitely can’t be real because the kiss, although wonderful, lasts what must be a good fifteen seconds with camera flashes going off even more wildly. Out of all delusions though, he doesn’t know why he’s having this one, especially right in front of the press’ very eyes.

When he opens his eyes, which have instinctively fallen shut, just to check, he sees it really is Xiao Zhan up close.

Xiao Zhan seems to sense his movement and opens his own eyes, drawing back gently. He doesn’t pull away though and gives Yibo his kind, stunning smile as if everything is fine between them. Like Yibo hasn’t ruined things in the most awful way and Xiao Zhan doesn’t hate him.

Yibo doesn’t know why this is happening, but even if it’s not real, he’s happy to remain in this delusion if Xiao Zhan would continue smiling at him like that.

But the clicks of the cameras and flashing lights suddenly attack his senses as if mufflers have been removed, loud and dizzying, and the noise of roused reporters comes rushing to his ears.

“Who is this man to you, Wang Yibo?”

“How would you define your relationship?”

“Does he have something to do with the recent events of your love life?”

Paralyzed, stunned, confused, Yibo can’t do anything, just gapes like an idiot as Xiao Zhan smoothly slides his arm around Yibo’s waist and turns to the press with his perfect smile in place.

Someone asks him who he is and what he’s doing.

“I’m Wang Yibo’s boyfriend and I’m here to congratulate him on his finish,” Xiao Zhan announces with such confidence there is no room for doubt.

The press mob bursts into a frenzy of questions as Yibo stops breathing. Most of him is still disoriented but a small coherent part is embarrassed that Xiao Zhan is acting like his crappy finish is an achievement. Xiao Zhan steadily leads him away from the crowd. If it weren’t for his arm anchoring his middle, Yibo might just tumble in front of a couple dozen cameras, all his years of dancer’s training be damned.

It isn’t until he’s safely sitting in the familiar passenger seat of Xiao Zhan’s car that he snaps out of it.

“My bike…” It should be done with the mechanics by now.

“We’ll come back for it later,” Xiao Zhan promises. He doesn’t start the engine though, doesn’t look like he’s about to take Yibo anywhere.

If they’re just going to sit alone in Xiao Zhan’s car, Yibo might as well address the looming elephant.

“What are you doing here?”

“To watch your race and support you,” Xiao Zhan says like it’s obvious.

Then he’s witnessed Yibo’s embarrassing performance today. “You didn’t have to pretend like it’s good,” he mumbles. “I came in seventh.”

“I’ll always root for you. I was sitting in your personal section but you didn’t look over.”

Because the last thing he expected was for Xiao Zhan to turn up. He half-expected to never see Xiao Zhan again.

But Xiao Zhan is acting like everything is normal and that he doesn’t hate Yibo’s guts.

“Are you mad at me?” he chances, hesitant.

“Absolutely furious,” Xiao Zhan confirms, even and firm. “You dumped me on TV.”

Yibo shrinks a bit. That was an awful move, but while he could’ve picked something other than a live TV interview to do it, he isn’t sorry for doing it.

But all that is for nothing now. Everything Yibo did for Xiao Zhan has been ruined.

“Why did you do that in front of the reporters? Now it’s going to be out there. You can’t cover up those photos or take back what you said. Everyone is going to think we’re a couple.”

“Baobei, do you really not see why I’m doing all this?” Xiao Zhan sounds exasperated, as if the answer is obvious.

No, Yibo does not understand why Xiao Zhan has popped up out of the blue acting like everything is okay after abruptly disappearing from Yibo’s life. Or why he’s acting like they’re still together, playing the part of the doting boyfriend for the public to see. Why he’s pretty much painted a target on himself when Yibo went through such pains to hide him away.

“No. What do you want from me?” Yibo asks miserably.

Like always when he sees Yibo in distress, Xiao Zhan takes his hands in his and kisses them. The look he gives Yibo is soothing and reassuring. “Darling, I resigned because I can’t fulfill the duties required of me. I can’t keep doing what the agency wants when I know it’s not what you want. I know you don’t want to keep hiding all the time, and, frankly, it’s better that we reveal this on our terms than have it come out eventually.

“I did what I did so you can’t use that bullshit excuse that you’re trying to protect me or whatever. I told you again and again I know what I’m getting myself into, but you don’t seem to get it. I’m willing to come out and deal with the press, the public, the crazy fans—hell, my ex-boss—if it means that you finally understand that _this_ is worth it to me. _You_ are worth it. And if this is what it takes to prove to you I want to be with you no matter what, then I’ll withstand everything. Even if things are rough, I’m satisfied as long as I have you.”

Yibo is amazed, his mind blown away.

“You can’t get rid of me that easily so don’t you dare try something like that again,” Xiao Zhan tells him sternly, jaw set. Then hisses, “And you owe me for dumping me _in an interview_!”

Yibo doesn’t know what to say, where to start.

Frustrated, Xiao Zhan grabs him and hauls him into a harsh kiss, shoving his tongue inside Yibo’s slack mouth. When they break apart, a string of saliva connects their mouths, and Yibo’s brain crackles back to life a bit.

“I love you, Zhanzhan.” It’s out before he realizes it, and then it’s too late to take it back.

Xiao Zhan’s eyes widen, and Yibo witnesses the remarkable transformation of his stern expression into a smile as radiant and stunning as the sun.

“I love you too, baobei.”

When he leans in, Yibo can feel that marvelous smile against his cheek as he whispers into his ear, “Just for that, I forgive you. But you’re still suffering through every art museum I want to go to without complaining.”

\-----

The photos of Xiao Zhan smooching him are on every major tabloid outlet by the end of the weekend. In almost every one, Xiao Zhan looks gallant sweeping Yibo into a kiss and whisking him away while Yibo looks various degrees of flabbergasted idiot. But it’s undeniable they’re a couple.

“Manager Wu is going to kill us,” Yibo mumbles, scrolling through headlines on his phone.

_CONFIRMED: Idol Wang Yibo has a boyfriend and is now in a relationship_

_Pop star Wang Yibo is officially dating his ex-manager_

_Wang Yibo is ‘back on’ again with boyfriend just days after announcing split_

Pei-shushu doesn’t miss a beat blending his foundation. “Of course. Why do you think your boyfriend quit before he can find out?”

Hearing Xiao Zhan be openly called his boyfriend is going to take some getting used to.

“He has every right to be angry,” Pei-shushu continues. “You two violated professional boundaries, lied to him outright, carried this on right under his nose, then made a huge scene in front of the press and created a PR nightmare for him.”

Ashamed, Yibo shrinks in his seat.

“But he’ll get over it eventually and then he’ll be relieved.”

“Relieved? That he doesn’t need to lift a finger because there’s a mob of angry fans who’ll finish me for him?

Behind their fashionable frames, Pei-shushu’s eyes roll up in exasperation as if Yibo is being a drama queen.

“Relieved that you didn’t turn out to be one of those vapid celebs with bad taste in partners,” he drily explains. “He approves of Xiao Zhan. You could’ve done far worse in picking a partner.”

\-----

Now that he doesn’t need to go into the office daily, Xiao Zhan spends a lot of time at Yibo’s condo. Yibo tries to make his stay as comfortable as possible, giving him whatever he wants in an effort to get him to move in permanently.

Xiao Zhan really is too good to be true: he makes breakfast for him before he leaves and has dinner ready when he comes home. On a rare occasion Yibo finished early, he came back to the mouth-watering scent of freshly-baked pastries. Xiao Zhan even tidies his place and somehow adds a nice, homely touch that his usual cleaning service never achieved. As with everything he does, Xiao Zhan excels at domesticity.

Yibo tells him that, snuggling up to him from behind as he’s cooking dinner. “Have you considered a career as a housewife? I think you’d make a perfect one,” he teases, grinning into Xiao Zhan’s shoulder.

“Ha ha,” Xiao Zhan sarcastically replies as he stirs the pork and daikon soup. “Is that a proposal or are you offering to pay me for my current services?”

Yibo blushes. He’d say the former but he knows better than to scare Zhanzhan off early.

Xiao Zhan keeps on talking, unaware. “Speaking of careers, guess what I got offered today.”

He doesn’t keep Yibo in suspense. “A contract from a modeling agency,” he says, laughing as if it’s ridiculous.

Jealousy spikes in Yibo at the idea of many others gazing at and admiring his boyfriend. Some modeling agent discovering his tall and very good-looking boyfriend is not a consequence he’d foreseen of the attention on Xiao Zhan. “What?”

“I know, right? What a crazy idea.” Only Xiao Zhan can say that genuinely unaware and not be fishing for compliments.

Even though he’s saying that, Yibo should nip this in the bud. “You know, you can probably get your job back at the agency if you play your cards right. Manager Wu likes you, so does everyone—Yu-jie told me. They’d love to have you back.” And maybe we don’t have to get separate hotel rooms when we have to travel, he thinks.

Xiao Zhan shakes his head. “I respect my time there, but I think my actions have proven how compromised I am when it comes to you. If I were the agency, I wouldn’t trust myself to make decisions in the best interests of your career. Besides,” he adds drily, “putting up with you half the time is hard enough.”

Yibo humphs. “Then what are you going to do now?”

Xiao Zhan shrugs. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe I’ll finally pursue my lifelong dream of becoming a pastry chef and open a bakery.”

Yibo perks up. “That’s a great idea! You’d make an excellent baker.”

Xiao Zhan keeps going, musing. “Or I can take some time off, do some traveling, maybe learn to ski.”

He gives Yibo a wink. “I’ve got a sugar daddy to take me, after all.”


End file.
